hello, hello.

my name is christina. this is my blog. i've been a bit absent. and absent-minded. and crazy-minded, too.

can one be a bit absent? how about crazy-minded? hey, this is my blog. i think i can be whatever i want.

adverbs or adjectives or what-have-you can just cease to exist right here, thank you.

let me tell you about my days:

casablanca. for the first time. i don't know how i lived my whole life without it. i can't stop thinking about how beautiful ingrid bergman is. and how she stepped on to that plane and my heart broke.
lots of soup and rice and pasta and warm foods for my freezing cold, casablanca-broken heart.
world market. my love. chocolate. olive oil. a sushi mat. things which just cannot be found in the middle of iowa.
one of my students switches his consonants around between his head and his mouth and things like "foffee" (coffee) and "you shan kit by me, ms. washa" (you can sit by me) come out and make me smile.
snowflakes flew yesterday afternoon for this first time this season. i can't help but to believe it's magic. even when the wind is whipping my crazy hair all over the place and blowing down my sweater, making me freeze, freeze, freeze in the education building which will not have heat for the next three weeks (run-on?)

that's it. love.

blllaaaaaaah

i'm so sorry for this incredibly boring blog. i mean, seriously. nothing. for like 2 weeks! what is this?!

anyway.

this is what i've been doing:
teaching. a lot.
crying. also a lot. i like to blame it on my hormones, but maybe i'm just a freak.
homeworking. an absolutely ridiculous amount. absolutely. ridiculous.
freaking out. did i mention this already?

somebody please tell me i am not the only one setting themselves up for feelings of failure with every single little teeny tiny thing.

example a) attempting to make homemade tortillas without shortening or lard. (yuck.) ending up in tears.
example b) spending hours and hours and hours on a hypothetical unit plan for class. crying because i knew i should have done better. getting an a. and then feeling like my professor gave me an a just because she felt bad for me. and then crying again.

uhm.... ok. somethin's gotta give here.

praise the lord fall break starts tomorrow at 1:00 p.m. i don't think i could hold out any longer for the blessed occasion.

gosh this feels good just to have some word vomit and blech this all up on you guys. thanks.
you're the best.

uhm.... ok. so where do we go from here?

i think i'll try and wrap this little vomit package up with some good things:

the sunrise.
the kids at the elementary school who are so patient with me and give me such joy.
pilates.
and yoga.
and my favorite red journal.
girl's night tomorrow.
and bangs. (like the kind in my hair right now...jason said i look like a british pop star... a good thing??)

peace. and love. and try to relax, ok? (this might just be for me)

miracles.

have you seen 'babies'? it's wonderful. we (jason & i) watched it last night. we laughed & i cried & it was just bliss.

also - i'm making bread! i cracked open 'the joy of cooking' & picked out a whole wheat style. it is rising now & looking beautiful!

jason has declared it to be a pumpkin day. we're going to go find some pumpkins, carve them, toast the seeds, and maybe even make soup (i'm skeptical of pumpkin soup, but jason says it looks good...)

i've been trying to limit my screen time - less facebook, more real books - hence the lack of updates. i think it will be a good switch & am definitely looking forward to living more intentionally - looking at what i'm doing & deciding whether or not it's actually the best for me (& those around me).

this season is just amazing me - the colors are becoming more vivid everyday & the smells, mmmm! campfires, harvest, crunchy leaves...

happy fall, loves.